So just about this time last week I became ill. Which never ever happens to me, and because of this I do not cope well when it does happen.
Luckily (she says), this only lasted for 24 hours and the following day I practically leapt out of bed, thanking the sickness gods for only cursing me for one day. At this point the phrase “don’t speak too soon” should be applied tenfold. Fast forward another 24 hours and I’m once again struck down with this cruel, mysterious illness. Thankfully, a couple of days after this second strike I really was feeling better and almost back to normal. And I say thankfully because the people around me were likely ready to murder me in my sleep by this point. Also I had some serious plans and didn’t really want to be ill and mopey for them – but mainly the murder-sleep thing.
These are a few of the thoughts I had while ill, and I’m guessing you do too if you’re anything like me (come on, don’t make me believe I’m truly the only pathetic sick person out there…).
1. Why me?
2. I’d give one of my organs to feel better right now. Or a limb. I’d give something pretty substantial.
3. I promise I’ll be a better person if you just make me feel better, please, sickness gods?
4. Why am I so pathetic?
5. Why is that I love doing nothing when I’m not ill…and now I have to do nothing I’m so bored? Oh I know why; life is cruel and unfair.
7. I’ll start watching a new tv show! But what one…
8. Oh, this is funny!
9. Hahaha, tv is great, this is my new favourite show.
10. I love tv.
11.This show is so boring, if I have to watch tv any longer I’ll peel my face off just for something else to do.
12. “Muuuuum, make me feel better :(” (works via text/phone call/face to face)
13. Maybe I’m dying.
14. Like it could be a symptom of something serious.
15. Yep, I’m definitely dying.
16. What song should they play at my funeral? Something sad, but upbeat, but not too upbeat. This isn’t a party, people.
17. Will I ever eat again?
18. When did I last shower?
19. Will I ever be able to stand up long enough to shower again?
20. Can you get addicted to paracetamol? Didn’t that happen to Robbie Williams? Is that where my life is headed now? Maybe I should just stay ill. It’s not all bad.
Yes, I’m in my twenties now and old enough to take care of myself but being ill makes me revert waaaay back in years. I can’t imagine having a career and a family and a life and having to blaze on when struck down with illness and I’m in awe of you if you do this obviously.